What is True Play?

I've recently been reading Dr. Peter Gray's work on play, and several aspects of his research have really resonated with me and my practice. He defines "true play" with several elements, but a few that stood out to me when reading were child-led, creative play, and structured.

In child-led play, as communication partners, our role is to follow and attune to what truly interests the child. It can be a significant shift for well-meaning communication partners to move from trying to introduce something they think the child would like, to instead observing what the child is naturally drawn to and exploring that with curiosity.

The second aspect, creativity, is about being genuinely open to a child’s suggestions in play and building upon them. For example, if a child hands you a stick and says it’s a dragon, how can we enter that shared world of imagination with them? Perhaps by picking up a gumnut and saying, “Oh, this is the helmet that will protect the soldier.” In this way, both the child and the adult know the stick and gumnut aren’t literally a dragon and helmet, but they choose to share this realm of imagination together.

The final piece that I found particularly interesting is structured play. While we often think of play as freeform, there are actually mental rules that guide and give boundaries to it—rules that are usually held in the child’s mind. Adults might have the experience of suggesting something in play only to be met with a firm “no” because the suggestion doesn’t fit the child’s mental rules. Some children have a very narrow scope for these rules, so they push back a lot during play, while others struggle to understand others' rules, making it hard for them to join or initiate games.

I think Dr. Gray's work offers really beautiful insights into play.  Here is the article if you are interested!